Sharing Steve :: New Stuff
Monday, February 28, 2005
 

Watching for Steve


Ottawa Citizen
February 27, 2005 Sunday
Final Edition
CITIZEN'S WEEKLY: READING; Pg. C8
Danette, can you read me?: Snapshot from the 67th Academy Awards


From The Big Show: High Times and Dirty Dealings Backstage at the Academy Awards by Steve Pond (Faber and Faber):

In the back, by the artists' entrance, crew members with walkie-talkies communicated with others out front, keeping track of precisely which nominees and presenters had arrived, which ones were on their way -- and, most seriously, which were unaccounted for.

With several walkie-talkies open, though, what emerged was confusing as often as it was clarifying.

"John Travolta is here."

"Thank you."

"Rene Russo."

"Thank you."

"Two of Patty Smyth's musicians are missing."

"Is Jamie Lee here?"

"Yes."

"Steven Seagal?"

"No."

"Do you read me?"

"David Alan Grier's limo is at Thirtieth and Figueroa in the limo one."

"Did anybody call Sharon Stone's car?"

"Sharon shut off her communication with us. We cannot reach her."

"Can you hear me, Danette?"

"Has Paul Newman arrived in back?"

"No, Danette, we have not seen him."

"Someone should try to reach Steve Martin."

"Danette, do you copy? Steve Martin is two minutes away."

"Hugh Grant, Denzel Washington, are those confirmed?"

"Yes."

"Arnold Schwarzenegger has arrived. Hugh Grant has arrived."

"I can't hear anything. Can you hear me?"

"What's the status on Steve Martin's car?"

"Danette, can you read me? Steve Martin's two minutes away."

"Winona Ryder has arrived."

"Winona? This is a new one."

"I know."

"Steve Martin ... with Diane Keaton!"

"That's something to tell the seating people."

"Got it. Steve Martin and Diane Keaton."

"Has Helen Mirren arrived? She's the only nominee we haven't heard from."

"Anybody we're missing, get on the phone and start calling those cars."

"Who are we missing?"

"Ellen Barkin, Tim Allen ... "

"What?"

"Ellen Barkin's coming in."

"Thank you."

"Can you guys hear any of this?"

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